Don’t Concern Yourself With That Book

T/N: I understand in the , some of yall were confused as to what day Ashley ran to Amor’s room. So, when the raws said ‘The night of the 9th day’ I think they were referring to the wee hours because I don’t think koreans refer to the wee hours as very early morning/dawn but instead they still think of it to be the night. TLDR: ‘Night of the 9th day’ refers to the very early morning of the 9th day aka 1-2am.

My feet had no choice but to stop with his firm and goosebump-inducing refusal. Amor looked at the cup he was about to drink as the steam from his drink continued to rise.

He was going to die after he drank that. Why? Why was he going to die? Why was he stuck in this storm like me? Was he going to die without knowing anything? I wondered why this world was so cruel and why it was not at all beautiful like in fairy tales.

I had the charm he gave me to chase away the hound which also allowed me to teleport and hence travel here quickly. Moreover, I knew the future. That was how I was able to come to Amor’s side so quickly.

I moved slowly so that he would not put up his guard.

Amor, what a pitiful prince. He might not have loved[1] me but he had compassion.

“… You knew I was coming.”

Amor was a powerful templar. This palace had been protected by his divine powers and it would never let anyone whom his will did not allow inside.

I had gone to the back door which had been tightly wound by vines and cried out his name desperately. As if I had been calling for my lover after we had broken up.

He then let me in.

“Do you like tea?”

“… What nonsense are you speaking after barging in like that.”

As if I did not care whether or not he was glaring at me, I managed to close the distance between us.

“Even if you do like tea, please don’t drink that.”

When I visited Amor in maid’s clothing, I had not expected such a situation. The person who I was talking to just fine today was going to die tomorrow. If I had known I would have to deal with this situation in the first place, I would not have touched the diary at all and I would not have to count the days I had before I was going to die.

I pulled on my head like a frightened rat. I was scared. But no matter what the consequences were of my actions today, I had to say what I needed to say.

The entire time I was looking at Amor, there was a soft chewing noise[2]. It was annoying. Like getting your feet stuck to a sheet of paper after stamping them on the ground. Like the stale smell of a dried coke stain on a long dress shirt. The indescribable chewing sound was annoying me to no end.

“You won’t believe me, but brother, if you drink that, you’ll die.”

I felt a little guilty as I wondered if the reason why Amor was going to die was because he met me.

Maybe I had reduced the life of the poor prince who was originally not going to live that long anyway. Or was he being punished in my place because I was trying to exploit the pitiful boy?

Either way, I was annoyed. I was the one who created this mess so I needed to act more desperately. Should I not have done anything in the first place?

But if I did not try to save myself, who would?

“You suddenly appeared in the middle of the night so I wondered what you were going to say. Are you finished speaking nonsense?”

When I knew he was going to die, my heart sank and dropped to the floor. If he died, who would take responsibility? What about Rusbella? Who would take over his role?

It felt as if I kept stepping into hot and cold baths alternately.

“I-I’m begging you. Please don’t drink that.”

I was feeling so nervous it felt as if the blood vessels to my heart were clogging up.

“What are you talking about after suddenly showing up like that?”

“I know you don’t believe me. I can’t explain it to you but listen to me. Please don’t drink it, brother. I don’t want you to die!”

In the wee hours of the morning when everyone was asleep. A night which had been dimly illuminated by the moon.

Amor still looked sick and handsome. Under the shadows, his eyes looked dark and gloomy. When they closed and opened again, it was accompanied with a fit of hysterical laughter laced with ridicule.

“… I wondered what you were going to say.”

For some reason, he looked more tired now than earlier during the day.

With one hand firmly grabbing the teacup he was just about to drink, Amor wrinkled his forehead and shouted.

“If you’re just going to speak nonsense, go back!”

This was not the first time I saw someone die before my eyes. I have sent my father as well as someone I loved off before my eyes a long time ago. So, it was not that scary to see Amor die. Then, why was I so desperate?

“I-I don’t want my brother to die…”

Then what was I so afraid of?

A strange thought suddenly struck me. Was it the strange sense of deja vu that passed through my head? Since I was already used to caring for a sick person, was I projecting my habits onto him?

“I’ll prove it.”

Ah, I was sure now. This was something I had failed to see because I had been struggling to survive.

“You can use me to test it.”

With one hand, I took the teacup from Amor. He was unable to stop the tea from trickling down my throat. Looking back on the situation, I might have been drinking hot tea but then at the moment I was only focused on one thing.

“If I die after drinking this tea, that means I was right, right?”

“You, you!”

Amor shot up and grabbed my skirt.

“Spit it out. Spit it out!”

But I had already drunk it all.

Cough.

Suddenly, it felt as if someone was strangling me, forcing me to cough.

Oh my, my throat was in so much pain, I thought it was burning. Let alone stop, the coughing only got worse and worse until at the end of the burning pain, I finally spewed out a spurt of blood.

“Hey!”

At the same time, those green eyes that resembled a gloomy yet misty sky were growing frightfully large as my vision began to shake violently.

“Hurry, split it out! I said spit it out!”

‘Let’s think about this.’

The diary stated that I would be dying in the hands of the Crown Prince on the 10th day of the month of Habermia. Given the circumstances so far, my future was fixed. It had been an absolute for me these past five days.

‘Was I going to die like this?’

‘But, let’s think about it even further.’

‘Why would a prince who would be busy with his own political affairs, come all the way to Terena’s Palace just to kill me?’

The truth would always be a little different from what was always known.

Rubella thought that Castor was a very nice person while Castor considered her a very stupid woman when they first met.

But Castor’s role as the sub-main character and his love for Rusbella became the reason behind his existence. In other words, him falling for her was an absolute that was going to happen.

If that was so, what was going to happen if I managed to break this absolute?

‘Let’s change the date of my death. If I died before the 10th day of the month of Habermia,’

“You. Why on earth would you do that… Why did you drink that!”

As my vision tilted, he caught me in his arms, causing me to splatter blood on his white cheeks. As I sat on the floor, Amor’s stature also crumpled as he supported me. His white robe was stained with my blood while it continued to flow on his marble floors.

… Amor.

I wiped his cheeks with my sleeve. My mind was distraught with the burning pain in my throat. It felt as though boiling water was being poured into it.

“… I hope my brother doesn’t die.”

I hope the future I envisioned would go perfectly.

“My last moment.”

I held back my groans and instead grabbed onto his cloak with my trembling fingers.

“Is for me to choose.”

I chose this.

At that moment, I chose Amor over me. Then why was he frowning as if he was going to cry…? His sky-colored hair that was illuminated by the half moon rustled and I laughed weakly.

“Cough. You must survive.”

What was Amor thinking now? Seeing his sibling whom he did not even know existed dying in his stead. His forehead finely wrinkled and a shadow was casted over his face. Looking closer, Amor had a strange expression on his face. Perhaps he was confused, knowing that he was stuck in a situation he could never possibly understand.

“I hope my death will be able to save my brother.”

I was a person who loved him from another world. He would not know but just for today, I hope he did.

Like my life was about to end, everything in front of me turned upside down and as the floor accelerated towards me, my eyes closed.

Now, what was going to happen?

If at this moment, I died in place of Amor.

I could not see it myself, but my face would probably look calm and a little playful.

At least, that was what I thought my face looked like.

‘Year 821, on the 10th day of the month of Habermia.’

I was supposed to die a day from now.

The future was dynamic. Either I chose option A or I did not. Depending on my choice, two, ten and even more futures could be made, creating the same number of world lines.

However, if the theory that parallel theories existed was in fact true, then why did the future remain the same even when I tried to act differently from what the diary depicted I did?

‘No matter what I did, why was my dress always ruined?’

The diary had remained the same but it was subtly different.

I had hypothesised and experimented and finally, I got the results.

I had no choice but to die that day.

In other words, if I was not killed on that day, I would not die.

***

Feeling as if I received a blow to my head, I felt dazed. I felt both empty yet stuffy as if I had eaten too much. The cold air and white sleepwear made me stroke my own neck out of habit. But I could not feel my neck. Instead, I felt a burning pain.

But there was no pain.

“This is just something out of my imagination.”

I muttered.

It just rained so the place was a mess. I felt my head starting to cool down so I relaxed and took a stroll.

Out on my marble balcony, I gazed upon the stars shooting across the dark sky which was much different from the summer nights I had in Seoul.

‘My lady, it’s time to wash up.’

“My lady, it’s time to wash up.”

Even if the princess went to bed late, work for the maids never stopped. How pitiful.

“You’re tucking in pretty late tonight.”

“Really? Sorry about that.”

Those who have no money were swept around on the whims of those who do. Those who were treated well wherever they go. I apologised to the maids who were forced to go to bed later for nothing.

“No, no. Don’t apologise to us. We were just worried you weren’t able to sleep. You’re not hurt anywhere, are you? Maybe it’s–”

“Insomnia?”

“Huh? Yes…”

“Yeah, I think you’re right. Insomnia.”

If only sleep could come to me.

Hannah, with a voice laced with worry, wished for me to have a good night’s sleep.

The hand that touched my forehead was very warm, making me panic. Actually, I had been panicking the whole day.

“Please save me, brother.”

Would I regret the choice I made?

I remembered the day I was choosing which company I wanted to join. I did not know then but the choice I thought to have been the best one turned out to be the worst. I was very scared and anxious but at the same time, I did not think much about it.

“Hannah. What day is it today?”

This was already the fifth time I asked today. Even then, Hannah answered sincerely whilst scratching her head.

“Since it’s already past midnight, today’s the 9th. The 9th day of the month of Habermia.”

“Do you all like working here?”

‘We like working here.’

“We like working here.”

Hannah gave a faint smile.

“We also like you too, my lady. It’s not easy for a woman to be treated this well when they’re working.”

The maids then bowed before leaving the room. Now left alone, instead of lying down, I looked up at the sky. Soon after, I quietly cursed before hugging my shoulders.

“This is impossible.”

On the other side of the room was a vanity and situated on it was a mirror decorated with tangled vines. It was dark and hard to see but if I stood in front of it, I could see a small child looking back at me. I saw this face before in the afternoon and I looked fine.

“Well, now I know I’m not a ghost.”

I was obviously still a human since ghosts could not be seen in mirrors.

“I came back in time.”

I took Amor’s place and drank his poison. Then, I returned to the day before I died.

[1]: Not romantically!!!

[2]: Metaphorical, not an actual sound.