Don’t Concern Yourself With That Book

“Look at this.”

Feeling the earth shake beneath me, I quickly grabbed onto a pillar.

“After hearing that, the righteous prince must be thinking of blowing this place away.”

The smile disappeared from Hernan’s face. Marissa swung her sword around lightly. Once again, a pale gust of golden wind blew, and scattered the dust and debris around us.

“If you don’t want to get caught in the explosion, you’d better hurry and come with us.”

“Please move out of my way.”

“It is interesting to see this agitated side of you for the first time but not now.”

Marissa grabbed me and turned me around before speaking playfully. Then, she laughed out loud.

“How fun. I’ve never seen you like this. This is the first.”

Just then, I heard footsteps coming from the stairs before everybody appeared at once. They were all wearing black clothes and covered their faces with masks. One of them ran over to Marissa and knelt in front of her.

“How’s the cleaning up?”

Marissa asked him.

“We’ve destroyed everything.”

Someone next to the man who replied politely looked familiar. I could see his coffee-coloured skin through his mask. His orange eyes blinked languidly. It was the man who bumped into me in the alley.

Only then did I realise why he reminded me of Dane. His eyes looked very much like Dane’s.

“Is this a betrayal?”

As he stared at the man who looked like Dane, Hernan muttered. In a flash, Hernan appeared in front of me and stretched a hand out towards me.

“You can’t do that.”

Someone blocked Hernan’s sword. When I looked up from Marissa’s embrace, I spotted a man blocking Hernan. After trying to push his sword forward a couple of times, Hernan withdrew his sword as he calmly shook his head. He then spoke, albeit slower than usual.

“Deros, move.”

When his name was called, the man flinched. But in front of Marissa, his feet remained strongly planted.

“I don’t think this child will listen to you? Duke. What more can you do when someone on your side decides to betray you?”

“… Saintess. Why is the head of the Emperor’s Shadows on your side?”

Marissa leaned on Deros’ shoulders and smiled lightly as if she was teasing Hernan.

“It’s because of love. Love. He’s fallen for me.”

“Damn it. What betrayal? Did the temple teach you that threats are considered love?”

“You’re no fun.”

Just then, boom. Another roar broke out.

“Damn.”

Regolith fell from the ceiling like rain and a serious fracture cracked through the walls above us as if everything was going to collapse.

Boom. Boom. Boom.

There was a series of chain explosions. I needed to hurry and get out of here if I did not want my life to take a strange turn. Getting crushed by debris was not the way I wanted to die.

Boom!

Just then the stone wall in front of me collapsed. My body swayed from the shock.

“Run away!”

I could see her flustered expression at first glance but I could not see her anymore because a large stone fell between us.

I looked down at the diary I held onto even when I fell before slowly turning my head.

Pant. Pant.

Hernan who had pulled me towards him was breathing harshly. Had he not pulled me before the stone landed, I would have been crushed to death.

“Are you alright?”

“Ah, yes.”

“Then, let’s hurry and get out of here.”

That was not the end. Debris continued to fall from above. After the aftershock, the earth shook once again. I did not know who it was but it looked like they were quite determined to destroy this building.

Brrr… Boom!

With a hardened expression, Hernan removed his mantle and wrapped it around my body. He then grabbed my wrist and pulled it as he ran. I walked faster to follow after him.

“If we continue down this path, we can leave through the exit on the first floor. We just need to travel a little further. Will it be possible?”

Panting, I replied, “Yes, that’s alright.”

But after a while, he stared at the hole in front of us with a complicated expression. The stairway had been shattered into small pieces, no longer retaining its original shape as only a few shreds of wood and the railing remained.

“Looks like there’s nothing we can do.”

Hernan who hardened his expression reached out before grabbing my shoulders. After he lifted me up, I managed to easily reach the upper floor with a light leap.

“… If you want to close your eyes, you may.”

What I then saw on the upper floor was a sight that I did not want to see. It was a scene of blood and inhumane carnage. I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. Hernan flinched.

“How far do we have to walk?”

“… Till the exit on the first floor.”

A faint light could be seen through the thick clouds of dust. Thinking I must be done observing, Hernan let me down. But it was our mistake for being too relieved.

As soon as we took three steps towards the light emitting from the exit, another explosion occurred that was incomparable to the ones before.

Boom!

I covered my ears and frowned. As my vision distorted, a huge shadow fell upon me.

“Duck!”

I could feel someone push me away harshly after seeing a sight that I could not believe. The moment the ceiling split into the two and began falling on me, the arm holding the sword swung down like lightning. A pillar collapsed and fell down as well.

“Fall back! Hurry!”

He managed to smash the portion of the ceiling into pieces with an explosive force but that did not mean he was perfectly fine.

“Hernan!”

I rushed over to his collapsed body.

I was out of breath. I was already used to this tingling headache and the burning sensation coursing through my forehead.

I was starting to feel strange because Hernan had already saved me twice now. Why? Why? Why did he save me?

Blood dripped from the tip of his chin. The red light that filled his eyes evoked the memories of a nightmare I had forgotten. The knights lining up. The maids that died. In my nightmare, I could see his face on the sidelines.

It was the moment just before I died.

“What do I mean to you?”

Hernan’s eyes that were as blue as a winter lake met mine. On that day, he was cold and detached. He remained indifferent as if he saw nothing at all. After getting cut and pierced by the sword into pieces, everything disappeared. After the hallucination disappeared, I saw his blue eyes blurring.

He coughed before asking, “Are you alright?”

I could not reply to him whether I was alright or not so I continued to stare without a word.

‘Why?’

I was not sure what expression I had on my face.

“Is it because it hurts? That’s why you can’t speak? Ha. You’re… bleeding.”

“I-I could say the same about you.”

I did not know what to do with this bloodied man who tried to save me. He looked much messier than when he got cut by Castor’s sword on my behalf.

‘Even back then, he could barely stand…’

The appearance of his pale face as he calmly asked how I was doing pushed me forward.

“Why are you saving me? You almost died trying to save me! Do you know what you look like right now? A mess…”

Hernan stared at me with one eye narrowed. His gaze was calm despite how messy he looked. As he stared at me, Hernan slowly tilted his head.

“Why did I save you… I’m not sure.”

“…..”

“You’re clearly not her…”

After coughing slightly, he replied calmly. Even in the darkness, his eyes remained fixed on me.

“I wonder why.”

Hernan lowered his head and scoffed.

“If I let you die, I thought I would regret it.”

Hernan emanated a fishy smell. Even after smelling it over and over again, I knew that it was the smell of blood that I could never get used to. His arms were soaked in blood. He slowly raised his hand to my cheek and brushed it against my bandage.

His hand wandered for some time as if he was just about to lower it before I held it.

“… Thank you for saving me.”

I let go of the hand I held. The tremors that had been shaking the building stopped for a long time now. He could have just removed the bandage if he wanted to.

Then, Hernan would know. As soon as he removed the bandage, he could have been sure of my identity. Still, the hand just remained on my cheek.

“You show more expressions than her.”

For a moment, he looked confused.

“… First, I should look for anything that looks fine. Since it’s dark.”

A big hand grabbed onto me as I tried to step away.

“Ha… Please… don’t… run away.”

As he leaned against the wall and panted heavily, he stared at me.

“Your image… keeps… overlapping with someone else’s. That… shouldn’t be normal.”

“… You’ve gotten seriously hurt. Not that I’m alright either.”

He let out a heavy cough which caused him to spew out a stream of blood before leaning back against the wall to catch his breath.

“Because I’m rambling, I don’t even know what I’m saying…”

“Hernan.”

“Don’t listen to me.”

I remained in his embrace as he struggled to breath. ‘Ahn’, ‘you’, ‘now’, his voice sounded as if was getting further and further away. He looked down at me firmly.

“It looks like we’re trapped.”

In this darkness where only our silhouettes were visible, he stared into the depth of the hallway.

“I should stop the bleeding first. It’s not good to leave it spilling for too long.”

I tore my sleeves off before grabbing Hernan’s arm and tying it roughly. I then rubbed my bloody palms off on the sleeves. As time passed, so did the pain fade.

I thought it was funny how I could feel the droplets of sweat on my forehead so vividly and yet the pain only felt faint now.

‘Maybe it’s because I’m taking death lightly now.’

I used his robe like a towel.

“Get a hold of yourself. Because I want to live. I need to get out of here.”

Though I might have said that, I could not take a step forward. Because of the hand that was holding me back.

“Where are you going? Stay here.”

Hernan pulled me towards him and turned me around. Hugging me once more, he embraced me with more strength.

“You and I are stuck here anyways.”

The fishy smell mixed with the smell of dust was very unpleasant to experience as I could feel his firm chest move up and down through the fabric.

“Wait. Until I recover.”

No. I shook my head and grabbed onto the hem of his clothes roughly.

“… No. Let’s leave.”

Blood and a sword. The afterimages of corpses that did not go away even when I closed my eyes. If I remained here, things that I did not want to think about would bother me.

“I have to leave.”

“… Don’t be stubborn.”

“I have to! We have to get out of here! I said I have to. Let go of me!”

I was out of breath. I was going out of my mind from the smell of blood. It seemed like my maids who died back then would appear from the dark. I was not ready to listen to their words of resentment that would pour out of their mouths.

‘Hannah.’

I called out the name of the maid who died in passing. My words that I could not let out broke inside me over and over again.

“I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to.”

‘I-I’m sorry. I couldn’t save you guys. I did. I was the one who killed you forty times.’

I got caught again when I tried to get up in a hurry.

“Calm down!”

Hernan held onto me without exclaiming even when my nails dug into him.

“Ah…”

Before I knew it, Hernan pushed me up against the wall.

“Damn it. Why does even your misery look the same!”