Don’t Concern Yourself With That Book

A bird was sitting right there but I had no idea when it arrived. I stared blankly at the railing upon which it was perched on.

“… That blue chest…”

It was Hernan’s bird. But what was Hernan’s bird doing here? Watching it, I realised that the bird looked a little different from before. The bird now looked more like a bird of prey, like an eagle or a hawk, not the lark I had been familiar with thus far.

“This bird will guide you.”

Come to think of it, that bird had once helped me before. It was back when I had jumped in front of that hound to save Rebecca. The bird that had swooped in to shield me from the hound looked more like a bird of prey. I was meeting the said bird once again.

“Hello.”

The bird was staring at me with a clueless gaze characteristic of any other animal.

“You don’t remember me too?”

I couldn’t approach it easily. Because I recalled how it had once pecked me persistently. But I still bit my lips and took a sudden step forward. The bird just sat there watching me as I approached it. And when I finally stood about half a step away from the bird, I noticed that the colours of the bird’s feathers looked a bit strange.

“Purple…”

The bird’s feathers looked to be a mix of purple and blue, becoming more indigo-coloured as the feathers got closer to the tail. I slowly caressed the bird. To my surprise, the bird just stared at my hand indifferently and didn’t try to attack me. I wondered what was going on? Feeling a little suspicious, I looked at the bird’s feathers more closely. Just then, I thought of something.

“Perhaps the change in Hernan’s eyes is related to the change in the colour of your feathers?”

Of course, the bird didn’t reply. The bird slowly closed its eyes as I stroked its soft tail feathers. Its white feathers reflected the moonlight even more. For some reason, I felt like crying.

“I know you.”

I remember this bird. Back in the administration, whenever I suddenly raised my head and looked up, I would see this bird perched on some tree watching me and become reminded of how he had been like a bird. Someone who was white and soft, someone who treated me gently and generously. At that time, I just didn’t want to know.

“You know. Thank you for bringing me to the stele so long ago.”

Why hadn’t I realised it then? No, I knew, I knew one thing. Too much. He had been too much. Back when nightmares were constantly wearing me down and choking me, he had approached me without hesitation and reminded me of them.

“I’m introducing myself too late, aren’t I? I know.”

We had missed the many opportunities that we had been presented to meet. After too much time had passed, he had confessed everything to me but it was too late. I realised then that he too was another victim.

“Timing is also needed for introductions. It’s something that can’t be pulled off if not communicated in time.”

He was a pitiful man. He told me he loved me and yet never allowed me to give him my reply. Before he disappeared forever.

“As if it had just been emotions.”

He had left me with so much sadness and sorrow before finally leaving.

“Hernan.”

As I slowly reached out to it, the bird stared at my hand.

“I’ve never called your name sweetly before.”

I’m sorry. This apology was for the you in the past. But if I were to go back in time, I would have acted the same way. Perhaps it was his misfortune for meeting me and for his companion to be me.

“Hernan, no matter how I thought about it. You shouldn’t have fallen in love with me.”

I felt something heavy on my hand. Before I knew it, the bird had brushed its head against the back of my hand before cuddling into it. Its square eyes that were unique to birds of prey looked so innocent and yet seemed to harbour something deep. As I gently stroked its brows, the bird closed its eyes.

“We should have never met. Your love had only caused me sorrow from the beginning till its end. Your love sometimes felt like hail to me. It hurt and I only wanted to avoid it.”

I felt sorry for him. I pitied his life. Because I knew he would eventually be forced to become a victim of a much greater power. But instead of avoiding his wrongs and his sins, he had faced them head on. He had confessed even though he knew it would be a love that would only shatter into pieces.

“Why did you love me?”

That love had only brought him pain and forced him to sacrifice.

“But Hernan, I had wanted to tell you something at the final moment. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t apologise for your sacrifices and I couldn’t even say thank you.”

Which was why.

“You have to come back.”

As soon as my hand brushed against its tail, its eyes looked pained. I recognised this pain. As I played with the feathers, the light they reflected changed from purple to blue.

But there were still more purple feathers than blue ones. As if they were hinting at something inevitable.

Beeeek–

The bird cried out loudly before flying off with another loud trill. Startled, I backed away. The bird that was about to leave through the open doors turned back around once. It was almost as if it wanted me to follow.

“Do you want me to follow you?”

The bird cried out once more. I slowly chased after it before soon breaking into a run. I chased after the bird as I ran into the dark hallway.

***

It was finally time for Hernan to arrive in the empty hall. One of the roots Amor had summoned wound around him.

Snip.

But the claws of the experienced beast cut through it again. Amor quickly stepped back before summoning a shield made out of dark roots to block the charging beast. Ray slipped between the cracks and thrusted his sword forward.

“Three steps. Just three steps more will do!”

Soricks cried out. With Amor’s beckoning. A couple of roots that were tightly intertwined struck the Templar of Beasts’ back like a hammer. Amor quickly scanned the ceiling and the hall.

‘Is that the spot?’

He whipped his head around until his vision turned clear. Ray was blocking Hernan from the window so that he would not escape through it readily. The knight had clearly said he was not a templar but Amor narrowed his eyes. Being able to grab the beast’s sword, strike him or dodge his strikes to drive him in the right direction were not skills a normal human would possess.

Cough.

Just then, like it had all been just a dream, his roots stopped moving. It was as if time had stopped. When Meta hurriedly turned his head around, he spotted Amor collapsed completely on the ground.

“My prince!”

Just when everyone was flustered. One person grabbed at the chance. The beast swung his body around. And took advantage of the moment when Ray lowered his guard. Hernan kicked off the ground and started running.

Pfft.

Everyone in the space heard the sound clear as day. Amor barked up violent coughs.

Drip drop.

The templars with a heightened sense of hearing noticed the sounds of it falling on the ground. When Soricks turned around, he spotted a clear trail of blood on the blade. The blood was dripping off the edge of the sword. Under the moonlight, it was clearly red blood.

“The 4th Prince, Amor. I’m here to relay a message.”

Hernan’s first words sounded relaxed.

“Hello, Amor. It’s me. I’m sending this message through Hernan since I cannot be there myself to tell you.”

The words that slipped through the beast’s lips were that of Castor. Amor then broke out into another fit of coughs.

“The poison you had consumed here so long ago. It contains the emperor’s divinity. You know that the divinity of the Lord of the God can be considered as poison to other templars, right?”

Amor’s back was hunched over. Slowly falling forward, Amor bent his knees. He managed to get a grip on the ground before looking up at Hernan.

“Sometimes, it could stop your heart. I injected your body with the Power of the Lord to bind you. And the antidote you have been taking so far contains the emperor’s divinity. Isn’t it funny how your poison and your antidote are the same thing?”

“Cough.

B-brother…”

“Instead of being a Templar of Plants, you were known more for suffering from illnesses. The emperor’s poison which had penetrated your body has engulfed it and left your body ruined in no time at all. In the end, you don’t have much time left.”

Hernan paused for a moment. He blinked his eyes slowly before continuing.

“I deliberately weakened the divinity in your antidotes. You’d probably not die from that but the lethality of the Power of Lord in your blood would not subside as easily as before.”

Amor knew he had just been imitating Castor’s manner of speech. The beast was just carrying out what his master had ordered him to and relaying what he himself had seen and heard.

“I had given you this palace so long ago.”

Hernan’s hands felt terribly cold. The coolness of his hands seeped into his skin as his vision faded on that very night.

“I don’t want you to die. But I need you to sleep for a while.”

At the very moment, Amor realised what Castor wanted to do. Ashley. That child came to mind before anything else. Even when his eyes were closing, he had missed her face so much.

“I can’t do that. Even if you do, brother…”

Amor lowered his half-opened eyes before speaking slowly but clearly.

“I’m going to do whatever I want.”

Splutter.

Amor had just coughed out blood but he did not stop talking.

“That child had saved me from the hell you kept me in.”

To Amor, Castor had been his first for everything. All his likes, his dislikes, his trivial habits, his smiles, his gestures, his gazes and even his tiny movements. With his entire family dead, he had no choice but to stick close to the man who brought him hell because he had no one else to turn to.

“I like you, Amor.”

Amor couldn’t bring himself to like Castor but neither could he hate him. What he felt for Castor was a complex mass of emotions that he could not exactly pinpoint and hadn’t been able to solve for the longest time.

“So, brother…”

With just a little warmth, he found a way out of the maze he had been trapped in. The warmth had been small but it gradually spread to become a blazing fire that moved to his chest. Its name had been his own.

“I will live without dying.”

The wind he could not muster in the past because he thought it had just been false hope.

“I’ll be looking at the same thing that child is.”

He wanted to live.

‘Just three steps to the target.’

He couldn’t see the front of him clearly. But Amor was still able to distance himself even with his fading vision.

“Is that all you had to say to me, brother?”

Hernan’s eyes seemed to glance towards the window for a moment before slowly turning to face Amor. Hernan spoke while looking into Amor’s eyes. These were Castor’s words which still borrowed the beast’s lips to be conveyed.

“Amor. I know what you said to Julian. Apparently, you’re going against me.”

“Have you ever thought that I might be letting you know on purpose?”