Crown of Thorns

Evan’s time to go back had already passed. Even so, Evan procrastinates and consumes the time. I couldn’t open my mouth easily even though I know I have to send him back. I have to mind the eyes of the world because he still has to bide his time.

At some point, the tower without Evan started feeling stark and bleak. I don’t want to send him away.

I kept my mouth shut, even though I was well aware that this was also greed.

“You know…”

With his red eyes shaking, Evan finally opened his mouth at me. But he couldn’t spit it out and mumbled for a long time.

“Can I just not go?”

Even though I felt the same as Evan, I was about to say no. I can’t be as grumpy as a child. Evan made a tearful face, frowning his eyebrows. I don’t know if he really wants to cry or if he’s appealing to my soft side by appearing desperate enough to cry.

“I like it here.”

Evan added in a hurry, fearing that I might voice my refusal.

“Nyx’s eyes are warm. They don’t hurt me. I don’t have to get hurt when I’m here; when I’m with Nyx. Can’t I just stay here?”

Pausing at the pain that was pushing up from somewhere in my heart, I took a deep and calming breath. Evan was now showing his wounds in front of me. He was begging me not to push him away, showing the pain he was suffering.

How crushed has he been? How many wounds does that little boy have in his heart?

I thought Evan might have been consoled by the witch who was trapped in the tower. Both his body and mind were tired of the constant shunning of the world. And so, he saw the witch, who had shut herself in a tower, and related to her. He even thought that she had it worse than him, so he might’ve assumed that he’d be relieved of his burdens if he associates with her.

But Evan went further and tried to make her tower a refuge from the eyes of the world. The witch was regarded as a fence to hide behind for the young warrior. How painful must it have been for him? To be willing to open his heart to the witch who cursed the world?

Even so, I was heartbroken at the sight of Evan, bleeding nonstop from invisible wounds. If he could stay by my side and no longer suffer from this, then I could stay together with him for as long as he allowed.

I don’t know if that’s really the way for Evan.

Will he be able to stay here and then go out into the world when the time comes? Maybe he’d give up becoming a warrior and would want to hide away from people. Or what if he just grows to resent and hate the people he’s supposed to protect?

The witch’s tower can’t give Evan a happy life.

“I don’t want to go. I just want to stay here.”

Evan’s blurry face reminded me of the young man who exists only in memory.

‘Don’t push me away.’

I remembered the voice of the young man saying, “Don’t push me away.” I could hear an appeal to let him stay by my side because he alone understood me.

The world that pushed a young boy to the edge of a cliff was so scary. I hated the world that made him hurt so.

“Yes.”

“Huh? Do you want me to stay here? Or not?”

I answered again, looking at Evan’s face, which was wheezing with bewilderment and joy.

“Stay here. Not for long, however. Because you have to fulfill your destiny.”

I knew I shouldn’t, but I let it go. I can’t push Evan away anymore, especially when he was begging me not to turn my back on him. In order for him to get his chance, I know he shouldn’t be here, and I know that the witch’s tower shouldn’t be his fence.

As if happy to just stay for a while, Evan was about to smile broadly, but he soon frowned, his smile faltered. Still, his vague smile hung awkwardly in the air between us. In a way, he seemed to be holding back his laughter. However, as he nodded strongly, I was also happy and decided to ignore what wasn’t important.

I won’t be able to be with him for a long time, but I hoped I could take care of Evan for a moment.

Yeah, just for a moment.

*

The future had changed the next time I turned the cards.

The warrior who was incited by people to go kill the witch eventually chose to side with her, so his death by human hands was pushed a little further away. But it’s still too early to be happy. Even though I already knew this much, I stopped him from staying in the witch’s tower. Death may be far away, but the God of Death is still with us anyway.

I couldn’t help it because he was born with white fur and red eyes. Due to their unusual appearance, animals born with those characteristics are always in danger, they are abandoned by the herd and are too visible to hide from wild predators.

Thus, he needed a fence to protect him from danger, not the witch, who was the enemy of the world, but the leader of the pack, protecting him from the crowd.

So, I let him live with the people outside the witch’s tower and patiently waited for an opportunity. But now that things have come to this end, there was only one way.

“I have no choice but to create my own opportunities.”

I raised my head, closed my eyes, and a gray world unfolded before me. But it was neither the tower nor the witch’s forest. The place I was looking at was Evan’s house. There was someone standing around somewhere Evan wouldn’t be. Unlike the skinny villagers, men with glossy faces and fluttering flesh stood inside and made the already narrow house feel even more cramped.

The man, dressed in fancy clothing that didn’t match Evan’s house at all, was grumbling and tapping on a few furniture pieces and floorboards with his cane. He complained that most of them were dirty, smelly, that this place was cursed and worse than a stable.

“Didn’t you say that he would be home by now? I thought it would be fun, so I came here myself for the first time in a long while, but it turned out to be a waste of time!”

“I’m sorry, please forgive me.”

The man was angry, wielding his cane at a guard several times larger than he was. His visceral face was full of venom. And it contained the arrogance of someone who did not fear the heavens. I knew who he was.

It was Teror, the second son of Baron Behemen, the lord of this village. While following Evan’s footsteps, I tried to find out about a lot of things; The village and its people, the witch’s forest and rumors, and even the world that would have changed ceaselessly while I was locked up. So there was no way I wouldn’t know who the person before me was.

And I knew why he came to Evan’s house.

“The official letter came in, and I had arrived here to deliver it personally. A saucy fellow, it’s a pity I couldn’t see his despaired expression. Is he dead?”

“He hasn’t come back since he entered the Witch’s Forest, so maybe he was eaten by a monster.”

“Eeeh, not fun. What’s the name of the man who claimed to have saved that cursed one? I remember him having dried-up rice straw-like hair and eyes resembling the defecation of a smelly beast. Vernus? Vernas?”

“His name was Vonus.”

“Oh, yeah. Right. I can’t forget that servile and pitiful look of his. I broke one of his legs, and he looked so hopeless. I guess he had faith in something on my territory. I was wondering if this brat would be just as fun as his brother was.”

I thought that this would be the case myself. It was because no matter how hectic the battlefield is, the person with excellent perceptive skills and senses must’ve been able to protect his body somehow. Perhaps the young warrior was aware of this fact and wanted to step forward to demand justice for his brother. However, no body had been found. Moreover, people did not care; they had already forgotten all about the man who died on their behalf.

Evan’s brother was not a ‘monster,’ but a human being. That title was reserved for Teror, who is now smiling like a demon before me.

“Damn it. Then who the hell am I supposed to send? I can’t go myself, can I?”

Teror left Evan’s house, frowning. The official letter they had received would have asked them to send the manpower needed for the war. Otherwise, they would receive punishment. Usually, it was necessary to refrain from doing so, but no one actually sent their own children. Resulting in most villages lacking men, and only very young children were left.

If Evan had been sent to town, then he would have suffered under Teror’s bullying.

At the same time, I felt stuffy.

There would have been no better chance than a battlefield. It was clear that if it had been the same as before, he would have gone to war. But it had changed because of my decision.

I was wondering what to do, but then I heard Evan’s voice.

“…what are you doing?”

When I woke up, Evan was approaching me with a disheveled look. Although he slept well, he tossed and turned strongly, perhaps because he was dreaming. Thanks to that, Evan’s white hair stretched and puffed up. It was so cute that I almost laughed. I turned my head in a hurry and greeted him, picking up the cards again.

“Hi.”

“Yes, hello to Nyx, too. Did you sleep well?”

I couldn’t sleep well. He swallowed what I wanted to answer and nodded quietly. My eyes were on the sofa and blanket that did not match the witch’s tower. Ever since Evan said he would stay at the witch’s tower, I had to bring this and that so he could sleep comfortably. And when I brought those things in, I remembered things I hadn’t thought about.

Should we sleep together? Or should we sleep separately?

It was impossible to bring two such large objects inside the narrow tower, but there were still many rules preventing me from sleeping beside Evan. The fact that I’m a witch was one of them, but I was afraid that it would scare him or make him uncomfortable.

Added to the fact that I couldn’t forget what he looked like after he grew up, even though he’s young now. I’m, finally, not confident that I could lay by Evan’s side.

But I couldn’t show it, so I had to wait for Evan to fall asleep, and then lean against the wall and paste my eyes on him. Since I’ve been sleeping until now, I didn’t have to sleep comfortably. Even when I was alone, I would just put my head on the wall or lay on the floor.

Though he still has a long way to grow up, I feel pathetic and ashamed for not being able to see him as a young boy, even though he may not be the young man who generously showed his heart to me.

To hide my feelings, I put down the cards and started to read the future again. The card I reversed revealed death. Just as Evan’s future has changed, so has Teror’s future. After all, is it Teror who goes to war? Or would there be another situation? While my mind was all over the place, Evan stood beside me, looking down at me.

“Who’s fortune-telling is that?”

“I’m waiting for the right time.”

He asked me again what I meant because he didn’t understand me, but I didn’t answer. Evan frowned with a discontented look. I then went to prepare breakfast to keep his mouth shut before he got more persistent.

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