Dysfunctional - An Assassin's Guide to Reincarnating in Another World

"Wha-...of course it matters, it matters a whole lot!" She protested indignantly.

"I can\'t believe this is really even possible...traveling to a whole different world," Remarked Persia in awe.

"It is kinda hard to believe," Nodded Az in agreement.

It was the 15th of March, and having finally gotten some free time with the peace in this world having mostly been restored, we decided to test out the Multiverse Rings for the first time.

It was just going to be the four of us this time, me, Persia, Az and of course, Belia, who\'d been pestering me to use the rings ever since she created them.

"I don\'t see why couldn\'t have used your ring on your own, you know," I said to her.

"I don\'t wanna go alone, and you can probably picture your old world much better than I can, so yeah," She grumbled in response.

"Well, fine, I have to admit that I\'m pretty curious myself to see if these rings really work."

"Hey, that makes it sound like you\'re doubting my work," She frowned with a huff.

"Because I am."

"Dick."

"Well, anyway, shall we do this? I wanna see what your old world is like, Kuro," Chimed in Persia, looking excited.

"Hey, question...what if a world we travel to has a being like Samsara who won\'t take kindly to us trespassing in another world or something?" Pointed out Az with a look of concern.

"If that happens, and it\'s pretty unlikely so long as we don\'t make any drastic changes to the history or flow of time, we\'ll retreat right away," Replied Belia, holding up her ring, before adding, "Now, come on, let\'s go already! I can barely contain myself anymore!"

"Alright, fine," I relented, as I closed my eyes and pictured my old world, before running some Mana through the ring.

I then opened my eyes as Belia let out a squeal of excitement, to see a portal opened up before us.

"Let\'s go, let\'s go, let\'s go!" She exclaimed eagerly, before running into the portal without hesitation.

"I don\'t know about this...what if we end up somewhere we can\'t return from?" Frowned Az uneasily.

"I was thinking the same thing. So let\'s wait...if Belia pops back in, we\'ll know it\'s safe," I reasoned, as the portal closed up.

And a second later, another similar portal opened up, Belia\'s head popping in with an indignant look on her face.

"Hey, what\'s the big idea!? Did you guys just use me as a guinea pig!?"

"Hardly, you rushed in yourself, it\'s not like we made you go first," I shrugged innocently.

"Anyway, did it work?" Az asked her.

"Well, yes, but people were freaking out about my wings and halo...I used a spell to wipe away the memories of everyone who saw me, portaled away to a spot with no people and then came back," She sighed in response.

"Hm, good to know. We should probably change into more regular clothes, and then use illusion spells to hide stuff like your wings and halo, Persia\'s ears and my Demonic features," I surmised, after mulling it over.

"Good call, we shouldn\'t draw any unnecessary attention towards ourselves," Nodded Az in agreement.

We then went to get changed into regular, normal clothes, before meeting back up in the throne room, where Belia cast illusion spells upon us to hide our features that don\'t exist in my old world.

"Hey, do you think we can go see the old you?" Persia asked me curiously.

"Not sure that\'s a good idea. Knowing how I was back then, I\'d probably attack us immediately," I sighed wryly.

"Oh, yeah, you were kinda violent that time when Elina reverted your body and memories several years younger," Recalled Az wistfully.

"Plus it\'s risky...having versions of the same soul come into contact with each other could be dangerous," Added Belia warily, before adding, "It\'s probably better if we only visit time periods before and after your life."

"Yeah, that\'s probably for the best. Alright, then...let\'s try a month after I died," I decided, as I focused and opened another portal, "Let\'s get going, shall we?"

I decided to pick New York to go to, picturing an alley. I stepped in first, just in case...if something goes wrong, I\'m the most likely to be able to get out of a bad situation.

I stepped out of the portal...to find myself in an alley, just like I\'d pictured...and there was a man being mugged by a group of thugs. Of course, all of their attention was now on me.

And their expressions only grew more bewildered as the others stepped out as well. Well, this is fun.

"Where the hell did you people come from, huh!?" One of the thugs walked over threateningly, brandishing a knife, "You didn\'t see nothing here, walk away if you don\'t want no trouble."

"A kitchen knife, huh? How adorable," I scoffed tauntingly in response.

"Don\'t say I didn\'t warn ya!" He exclaimed, as he tried to stab me.

As the blade hit my torso, it halted...before bending as it failed to pierce my skin, and then snapping in half.

"Oh, I get it, this must be some kind of act or something, right? Nice toy knife, it almost looked real," I smiled in response, as he stumbled back in fear, staring at the broken blade in disbelief.

"You seem to be enjoying yourself," Muttered Persia slyly, as the person being mugged took the opportunity to run away.

"This looks fun...," Grinned Belia eagerly.

"Can we just go look around or something instead?" Sighed Az wistfully.

"They\'ve seen our faces, waste these fools!" Declared one of the thugs, as he drew out a gun and began firing.

Belia stepped forward with a smirk and put up a shield made of her Weathering Magic, the bullets turning to dust.

"Wh-what the hell!?"

"Yo, I\'m outta here, fuck this shit!"

"W-wait for me!"

"Hey, that was fun...let\'s find more lowlives to freak out!" Suggested Belia with a gleam in her eyes.

"How about we don\'t? Instead, let\'s just check this place out and try out the food or something," Responded Az with a look of exasperation.

"Wait, what about money?" Inquired Persia with a frown.

"No worries there, I can just use some illusion magic to make them think we have money," Smirked Belia with a thumbs up.

"Maybe we should\'ve taken the wallets of those thugs," I remarked with a sigh.

We then headed out into the city and roamed around the place...I haven\'t been here in so long, it feels kinda nostalgic. Though, the last time I was here, it was on a mission to kill some rich guy who was involved in child trafficking.

We then went into a shopping mall and checked out a bunch of the stores inside, buying stuff like clothes, accessories and other random stuff...well, \'buying\' isn\'t quite accurate. Let\'s be blunt, we were stealing.

Belia used illusion magic to conjure up large stacks of cash, giving it to the cashiers and telling them to keep the change while she struggled to hold back her laughter as she stared as their gleeful and grateful expressions.

Once we were done shopping, we headed for the food court, ordering a ton of stuff, like pizza, burgers, tacos, and the like, a bit of every type of fast food in the place.

"These are pretty good, but I have to say, they\'re not really any better or worse than the food in our world," Remarked Az, as he munched on some pizza from the Hut.

"If anything, this food is a whole lot more greasy," Sighed Persia, as she wiped her mouth with a tissue and stared at the layer of grease in bemusement.

"That sure does explain why there are so many absurdly fat people here," Added Belia in amusement.

"Yeah, now that I think about it, there really aren\'t that many obese people in our world, huh?" I realized as I looked around.

"Uh, we\'re not gonna end up like that if we eat this stuff, are we?" Inquired Persia warily.

"Don\'t worry, they got that way by eating this stuff pretty much every single day, one unhealthy meal won\'t kill us," I grinned in response, before adding, "But if you\'re worried, I can use my Healing Factor later to erase all the grease you\'ve eaten."

"Do that to me too. I mean, just look at this thing," Grimaced Az, as he held up a piece of fried chicken and gave it a slight squeeze, several drops of oil dripping out as he did, "I mean, it tastes great and all, but we might as well be chugging bottles of oil."

"Did you have to say that, I think that just killed my appetite," Groaned Belia in response, "So...what should we do next?"

"Well, we could check out another country, there\'s plenty of places in this world I\'ve never been to...but I\'m also curious about the future, what this world is like in about a hundred years or so," I mused in response.

"Time isn\'t a problem, we can spend as much of it as we won\'t...so let\'s do everything we can think of!" She declared in response, as she bit into a chicken nugget that she\'d practically dunked into a tub of ketchup.

So much for her appetite being killed, huh.

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